Myths & Facts: Common Misconceptions About Divorce in Virginia
Divorce can be one of the most emotionally charged and confusing legal processes a person will ever face.
Between well-meaning friends, online forums, and TV dramas, misinformation spreads quickly.
At the Law Office of Li-Shann Durst, PLLC, we regularly meet clients who come in believing certain “facts” about divorce that simply aren’t true. Clearing up these misconceptions can help you make informed choices — and avoid unnecessary conflict or expense.
Here are some of the most common divorce myths we hear from Virginia clients — and the facts that can help you move forward with clarity.
Myth #1: “Everything is split 50/50 in a Virginia divorce.”
Fact: Not exactly.
Virginia follows the principle of equitable distribution, which means property is divided fairly — not necessarily equally.
The court considers factors such as:
Each spouse’s financial and non-financial contributions
The length of the marriage
Economic circumstances
How and when the property was acquired
For some couples, “fair” might look like a 60/40 division, depending on their situation.
Myth #2: “Mothers always get custody of the children.”
Fact: Custody in Virginia is based on the best interests of the child, not gender.
Courts consider many factors, including:
The child’s relationship with each parent
The parents’ ability to cooperate
Each parent’s role in caregiving and decision-making
Fathers and mothers have equal standing in custody cases under Virginia law. In many situations, parents share joint legal and physical custody.
Myth #3: “You must prove wrongdoing to get divorced.”
Fact: Virginia allows both a fault-based and no-fault/uncontested divorce.
A “fault” divorce may involve adultery, cruelty, abandonment, felony etc. However, many couples today choose a no-fault divorce, based on living separate and apart for the required time period (one year, or six months with a written agreement and no minor children).
No-fault divorce is typically faster, less adversarial, and more private.
Myth #4: “Spousal support is guaranteed.”
Fact: Spousal support is not automatic in Virginia.
The court evaluates factors such as:
The length of the marriage
The financial situation of both parties
Each spouse’s contributions to the family and household
The reason for the breakdown of the marriage (in fault cases)
Support can be temporary or long-term — or not awarded at all. An attorney can help determine whether support is likely in your situation.
Myth #5: “You don’t need an attorney if you agree on everything.”
Fact: Even in an uncontested divorce, legal guidance matters.
Agreements still need to be properly drafted to be enforceable under Virginia law. Small mistakes — like unclear wording or missing clauses — can lead to major problems later.
An attorney ensures your Marital Settlement Agreement (MSA) protects your rights and reflects your intentions clearly.
Myth #6: “You have to go to court to get divorced.”
Fact: Not always.
Many divorces in Virginia are handled out of court using methods such as collaborative law, negotiation or mediation without a traditional courtroom battle.
Alternative dispute resolution not only reduces stress — it often saves time and money.
Ready to Separate Fact From Fiction?
If you’re considering divorce in Virginia and want to understand your legal options clearly, we can help you separate myths from the truth.
📞 Contact the Law Office of Li-Shann Durst at (703) 443-4762 or schedule a confidential consultation.
We’ll help you make informed decisions — grounded in law, not misinformation.
Disclaimer
This article is for informational purposes only and does not constitute legal advice. Every case is unique. Please consult an attorney for advice specific to your situation.
